It’s called sabotage.
It’s when you give in to that pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice-cream after a two hour, hard-core-butt-kicking work out; you’re JUST starting to see results.
It’s when you out of nowhere need a new rug, new silk pajamas, kitchen utensils, oh! and a new fall scented candle (again, that you really don’t need) after getting a raise & then end up with less money than before.
It’s also when out of nowhere you (subconsciously) manifest a car accident, broken appliance or small kitchen fire after getting a raise that brings your new income back down to exactly where it was before.
It’s when you win the lottery & somehow blow through all of the cash (and some) and unfortunately go back to being completely broke.
It’s when you get a promotion then mess it up by making a small avoidable mistake that costs you your promotion.
It’s when you are finally in a relationship with a great guy & you constantly find things to fight with him over to the point that he can’t take it anymore & ends it.
Do you get where I’m going with this?
In our minds/brains, we have these “hard-wired beliefs” — they begin to accumulate and harden from the time we are children as we are continually “conditioned” certain ways.
Let me give you a scenario: You grew up in a very modest home. Your parents’ combined income never exceeded, lets say, $45,000. Their money mentality was that they had to work really hard to make ends meet & hope nothing bad happened. They didn’t have much savings & woke up everyday praying to God a rainy day wouldn’t come their way, yet somehow a rainy day always came and wiped out the little savings they did manage to save. It’s funny because they thought they were on a great roll, yet their savings never surpassed $2,000. When you asked for a new toy or new shoes they said, “No, we can’t afford it. What do you think, money grows on trees?” or… “You have to earn those shoes! You don’t deserve them. You got C’s in school!”
Fast forward 10-20 years and you are now in the real world… you’ve achieved a nice little bachelor’s degree (and a hefty amount of debt) & you score a great position at a nearby consulting firm. You work your ASS off! I mean, you come in before everyone gets there & you leave after everyone else leaves. You go above & beyond and become one of the companies greatest assets. Your starting salary is $36,000 (with benefits, of course). You want a raise, but your too afraid to ask. Three years pass, and you FINALLY get a raise. Your income goes from $36,000 to $42,000… pretty nice! Then all of a sudden, you spend uncontrollably. Instead of living a $36,000 life like you have been for the past three years, you bump up your lifestyle to a $42,000 lifestyle. Now, it may not seem like much but you manage to get your self in some serious debt (on top of your existing school debt) because you think your new salary can handle it. Now, you can’t even afford your $36,000 lifestyle.
We all have what’s called a “financial thermostat”. If you put your air conditioning thermostat set at 72 degrees, is the temperature going to change much? No… and if it does, your thermostat’s job is to do whatever it has to do to get that temperature BACK to 72, where it is set to. Same with your mind; if your financial thermostat is set at $36,000 — you will never obtain MORE than that and if you do, because in your subconscious mind anything above that is not SAFE, your subconscious mind will find a way for you to get your income right back down to that comfortable spot of $36,000. The primary purpose and goal of your subconscious mind is to keep you safe!
Yes, it is very unfortunate. It sucks. Sometimes it makes me angry. But I have to remember this: It is only trying to protect me and keep me safe!
If you were in an abusive relationship that you were able to escape from and then jumped into a new relationship 6 months later with a person who just so happened to be a wonderful guy, truly and genuinely, you would go right into saying, “this is too good to be true!” — you may nag him like crazy, accuse him of things he never even so much as thought about. But in order for your subconscious mind to keep you from getting hurt like before, even though this guy has no intention whatsoever of ever hurting you in any way, your subconscious will step in and FIND a way to push him away.
So how do we obtain the life we truly desire without sabotaging it along the way?
One… AWARENESS! Identify your limiting belief, acknowledge it, become aware of its presence in your life and how it is playing out in your everyday life. “All men are abusive,” “I’m not worthy of making more than $36,000,” “Losing weight is too hard, I don’t deserve to get rid of all this extra weight.” (This can be a very easy process for some while others it takes some time along with some serious TLC). Lose the judgement of yourself because chances are, these beliefs are not even yours! They are beliefs you’ve taken on from the ones who raised you! Did you hear your mom speak badly about herself? Did you see her look in the mirror at herself with hateful/judgmental/disappointed eyes? You probably picked that up and there’s a high probability you have done what you saw your mother did… She did the best she could with what she had and knew at that moment. But consequently, you adopted her belief of not being good enough without either of you realizing it!
Two… what belief would you like to replace it with? Think of your belief as a file stored in your computer. You have the power to go in, delete it, and create a new file that better suits your lifestyle needs. How about, “I am deserving of a wonderful man,” “I deserve to look & feel my best,” “I love and honor myself by making loving choices for my well-being,” “I deserve abundance.” You can have anything in this entire world and you deserve to live your best life. If one of my examples has made you feel uncomfortable then it is probably the right belief to adopt. Strive for that belief! YOU DESERVE IT!
Three… dig DEEP and RELEASE. There are many different ailments, practices, techniques, etc that can help you release old beliefs & adopt new ones into your life that will better serve you and your life’s purpose… If you stay in your comfort zone, there will not be much growth, if any at all. Dedicate yourself to GROWING by getting uncomfortable, face the demons of your past… face the hurt, the pain, the struggle, the sadness, the anger, the resentment, the hatred… allow them to come forth and cleanse them from your soul. Thank them for their presence, as they have brought things that need to be healed into your awareness and let them know (yes, talk to them and your subconscious mind) that they are no longer needed. Their purpose has been served. It is SAFE for you to move forward from them. You DESERVE to be happy and joyful. You DESERVE the life you desire.
Be courageous in facing your demons and you will live a JOYOUS and PROSPEROUS life!!!
As I develop my blog, I will begin to offer in depth practices & techniques that anyone can do. Please stay tuned if you have enjoyed what you read!
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