I remember the first time I saw this quote. It knocked me off of my feet for a minute. It was just what I needed to hear, exactly when I needed to hear it. I’ll forewarn you now: If you are part of the he-man women hater’s club, please exit. I love my guys, they are amazing providers and hunters. They are amazing fathers and wonderful husbands. They are hardworking and successful business men. But this particular post is to all of the beautiful women of the world. All of the women who want more for their lives, who just want to be loved and feel connected to others. For every mom who wants to feel like she makes a difference in this world and who wants the support of other like-minded beauties.
We (females) are the only creatures that are constantly changing in comparison to males. We grow boobs, we get our periods, we house a growing fetus, we push babies out of our va-jay-jay’s, we get achy backs and stomachs once a month. We wear makeup and do our hair daily. We get plastic surgery to enhance our God-given beauty. We change our noses. We fill our wrinkles. We lift the skin on our faces. We act a certain way to impress a certain someone. We sacrifice who we are and our happiness to adjust to our lovers. Society expects the woman to change, not the man. From the minute we can bat our eyelashes, we are being primped with bows and toe nail polish. We are expected to always look our best. We are expected to make a 5-star dinner in heals with a baby on our hip, while quietly dealing with the challenges we as women face on a daily basis. We are expected to be the mother, the hooker, the house keeper & everything in between for our men. Have you ever thought about it that way? That women are the ones in constant change, not the man?
And that’s okay. I am happy with who I am and I am happy being a woman. I’m happy with my role.
What’s not okay is when we don’t give ourselves enough credit for how amazing we really are. You’ve heard it before, when we have children– we are expected to be the mother, the father (at times or all the time), a chef, a maid, a taxi driver, a referee, a teacher, a paramedic, a boo-boo kisser, an entertainer, a therapist, the lover, a jungle-gym and whatever else you want to add to the list. So how come we’re still so hard on ourselves? We are the most amazing multi-taskers to ever walk this planet, at least that’s my opinion.
To top it all off, we compare ourselves to the Betty Crocker who lives next door who seems to have it all figured out. I admit, I can be quite competitive at times. I’m learning to use what I think to be my negative traits and channel them into a positive direction (a post to come)– so instead of being competitive with other women– competing with my best self, competing in business or competing as an entrepreneur– whatever it is that actually adds productivity and genuine growth to my life. I don’t want to get by in life by stepping on other people, especially other women. I want to unite and connect. I want to cry and laugh together. I want to grow lifelong friendships with other women and mommies and caretakers and momprenuers.
Anyways, what’s my point? We are in this life together! If we learned how to build each other up instead of gossiping about the next girl’s cellulite or fake boobs. Who the hell cares. When all is said and done, does that really matter? No! We are all going through our own stuff, we’ve all been dealt different piles of sh*t without a clue as to how to dig through it. Until we actually sit down and take the time to get to know someone, we have no idea what the other person has really been through and what kind of effect that has had on her life.
How can you add value to another woman’s life? Maybe it’s something you already do, everyday. Just by being a friend. Or a mother-figure, or a sister-figure. How can you expand that and zoom in on it and make it greater and bigger? How can you live consciously with purpose as opposed to auto-pilot? How can you lift another woman up and inspire her?
I love you all, each and every one of you beautiful beings. Even if I don’t know you personally, or very well, or if I’ve only spoken to you about the weather. It’s my goal to practice this everyday. I want to love and feel connected.